Shani
“It is okay to nurture the people around you but don’t forget about nurturing yourself.”
Shani is someone you can open up to. She is always ready to listen, take on an adventure or have some fun. She speaks the truth and follows her heart. Meet Shani. This is her story.
Shani (middle) in the mountains with her friends (her happy place)
P: Please introduce yourself!
S: My name is Shani but my friends call me Shan Dawg. I am 28…closer to 29. Australian but currently living in Canada. I am fortunate enough to consider both of these beautiful countries home. I am a proud Indigenous Australian, a Gunggari woman. I think this is a large reason I still feel so spiritually and emotionally connected to Australia even though I am physically far away.
P: Describe or define yourself in your own words.
S: I would say I am a very adventurous person and a dreamer. I seek activities and fun things to do with my time. As a child I would go around announcing how bored I was, always looking for a willing participant to play games and go on adventures with. I do have a lazy streak and procrastinate with certain things (always dreaming, never doing), but not when it comes to spending quality time with friends and especially family.
I am an extrovert and would consider myself pretty outgoing. I am always filling my days off and spare time surrounding myself with other people. Unlike an introvert this is how I recharge my batteries. I am very passionate about connecting with others. I love the mountains, they make me feel grounded. I also love the ocean because it feels adventurous and like anything is possible.
Dogs are amazing, I love them and think we can learn a lot from them.
S: What is your favourite thing about yourself?
This is tough because I think I have a couple of favourites but they definitely play into each other.
1- I would say I am a great listener. I find people often open up to me about things going on in their lives even if we have only recently met. I love hearing people's stories and connecting with them on that deeper level.
2 - One of my favourite things is my ability to quickly develop positive and strong relationships with people. I am very inquisitive when it comes to people's lives and what makes them who they are. This can be intimidating for some so I do try to respect that. All of this is a two way street and I am a very open person myself. I love to tell people about my life and how I got where I am so I think that makes it easier for people to feel they can open up to me.
P: Tell us a story. Have you had an experience that has defined you or made you stronger?
S: I believe that life is full of defining moments from the very smallest things to the “big life decisions”. I would say one of my biggest life defining moments was definitely moving to another country half way across the world, by myself. I have learnt so much about myself in this time and grown much stronger as a person. But lots of little things definitely lead to this:
I took a job in administration at The University of the Sunshine Coast. Here I was surrounded by so many incredible women that had done amazing things with their lives. They really became like extra mothers and sisters to me. These women were older than me but younger than my own Mum so it was great to get this new perspective of what a great woman could be. They were constantly telling me of these great adventures they had, living overseas and meeting different people. They all had different stories to tell but they all had a similar message: explore the world and have as many adventures as possible. It lit a fire in me. Sometimes the fire would dim and I would forget about it for a while but it never went out.
The ongoing support of my Mum and Dad. They encouraged me to do anything I wanted to do with my life. There was never any pressure that I had to live my life a certain way. Without their constant support I never would have been able to do the things I had done.
Last but not least, I left a long term relationship to pursue my dream of moving to Canada. This was a really tough time in my life. It was really the first time I had made a decision for myself. Too often I put more consideration into how my decisions will affect other people's feelings and not my own, but this was the first time I was able to flip that around. I think I always would have had a “what if” feeling if I never made this decision and didn’t get the opportunity to start my adventure in Canada.
P: What is one piece of advice you’d give to your younger self?
S: My mood and feelings are heavily influenced by those around me so I often find myself trying to build other people up. So my advice to my younger self would be, “It is ok to nurture the people around you but don’t forget about nurturing yourself.”
I saw a quote on instagram recently that said “Stop shrinking yourself just to make other people feel big” and that really resonated with me. I guess I am still working on it haha.
P: What does being a woman mean to you?
S: This is a hard one to define because being a woman can mean so many things. I guess I would say the one quality that I constantly see in the women around me is strength, but not necessarily in the typical sense. My mum has shown great strength over the years. Every time she gets knocked down she finds a way to get back up again (queue Chumbawamba - Tubthumping). Seriously though she has taught me that I will experience tough times, but I can come back stronger than before. Most importantly she taught me that it is ok to seek help if you are not ok, that there is strength in this too.
All of my greatest friends, Jamie, Emma, Chardy, Katie, Jess P, Tamika, Brooke, Tash, Hannah, Lisa….the list could go on and on, but they have all shown great strength in their lives in so many different ways. I am grateful that through their displays of strength I have become a stronger woman myself. I seriously keep revising this list and it is getting out of hand but seriously all of the women in my life are amazing so big love to them.
P: Who is one woman that inspires you? What would you say to her if she were here now?
S: It is probably cliche’ but I would have to say Jacinda Ardern. She honestly is such an inspiration to so many women and young girls in New Zealand and across the globe. She is leading that country with such grace, strength, kindness and compassion. She is stern but in a caring way, kind of like a mother to her children - except she is mothering an entire country.
She is inspiring all future generations that they can literally be or do anything they want and they don’t have to bulldoze everything and everyone around them to get there.
I would have to just say thank you to her for inspiring confidence in women everywhere.