Sandra
“It has taken me quite a few years, but I have finally learned that being a woman, you are able to make your own decisions and rules.”
Sandra is determined, hard working and family-oriented. She is always connecting with her loved ones across the globe, and working to connect with family she has yet to meet. Meet Sandra. This is her story.
Sandra (far right, back row) with her family (her happy place)
P: Please introduce yourself!
S: Hi! Sandra (Anderson) Graham here, formerly Barbour, formerly Jones. Graham is my maiden name. Like many Scottish families, my middle name, Anderson, is a family name. I was born in Townsville, Queensland, Australia on 2nd December 1951 – one year to the day after my parents and four older sisters left Glasgow Scotland to migrate to “The Land Down Under”. My sisters ages at the time were: Jessie 7yrs 5½mths, Maureen and Jean 3yrs 9mths and Christine 1yr 11mths.
Jean, Christine, Jessie (back row) and Jimmy, Sandra, Maureen (front row) (1958)
Quite a handful for mum (Jessie) and dad (William) on the six weeks boat trip from Southampton England to Brisbane Australia. My dad said when I was born that he had travelled half-way around the world and “had another girl!” I was always my Daddy’s girl.
I had a happy childhood growing up in Townsville with my family. Dad’s sister and Mum’s brother had also migrated from Scotland. I grew up playing with some cousins and writing letters to others. Family has always meant a lot to me and I wanted to establish a bond. Over the years, with my travels and people visiting, I have met more family. Thanks to Facebook I am in touch with heaps of relations. My DNA has also brought me a few more. It is extremely exciting times.
P. Tell us a story. What is an experience that has defined you or made you stronger?
S: I first married at 18 (December 1969) – Raymond Jones, a soldier in the Australian Army. We lived in Townsville, Newcastle, and Sydney (both in New South Wales). We separated in March 1973.
My second marriage in October 1976 was to Jim Barbour a childhood friend – his parents had migrated to Australia from Glasgow in 1949. Jim and I have had a “different” relationship. We separated in 1993 and I moved to Brisbane Queensland. We stayed good friends and never got divorced. In about 2000 Jim moved to Brisbane and we were together again. In 2012 we decided it was not working as husband and wife. For the past nine years we have been sharing a house and probably living more like brother and sister. We get on so well together like this. It would not work for everyone, but it works for us. Jim has no children or siblings, and his parents have both passed. We have been friends for 66 years.
We have lived in Townsville, Mt. Isa, Ipswich, Brisbane. Nambour and Caboolture. We currently live in Deniliquin NSW. A small town in the “outback” with a population of 8000, known world-wide for the Deni Ute Muster in October each year.
I lived in Auckland in 1974/75 and absolutely loved it.
Together we have visited New Zealand, Scotland, England, Eire, Ireland, Turkey, and a little bit of Greece. Tasmania is part of Australia but reminds me so much of New Zealand. We have visited there about ten times.
Sandra and Jim (2018)
Unfortunately, I was unable to have children and believe my work has always been my saviour and my jobs have been mainly caring positions – Hospital Admin, Medical Receptionist, Supervisor and hands on in Disability and Aged Care. I loved my work and started when I was14 and retired last May at 68.
My all-time favourite position was Medical Superintendent’s Secretary at the Mt. Isa Base Hospital.
I used to participate in Ten Pin Bowling. I was quite good in my Grade and won quite a bit. I held the Australian Restricted Masters Trophy and a few Australian records. I think this was in the late eighties/early nineties. Restricted is the division below Open. I have aged now, and the body does not work as well. Therefore, I am unable to bowl these days.
Bowling taught me to lose and, also to win graciously, never let a game turn into a grudge match.
P: What is one piece of advice you’ve give your younger self?
S: If I could advise my younger self of anything it would be:
think things through more before acting on them,
do not trust everyone – get to know them first,
stick to the yearly budget you have always done,
follow up on things you have thought you may enjoy.
P: What does being a woman mean to you?
S: It has taken me quite a few years, but I have finally learned that being a woman, you are able to make your own decisions and rules and not have to conform to the “norm” of my childhood and teenage years.
P: Who is one woman that inspires you?
S: I am inspired by a few female authors and scientists.
My current inspirations are Katherine Johnson, Dorothy Vaughan, and Mary Jackson. These are the three African American ladies depicted in “Hidden Figures”. This movie shows the plight of all women in that era and I, for one, was pleased to see these circumstances finally come to light.